Some people get a say in their love life. Others live in a small town.
If you’ve ever been single in a place where everyone knows your name, you’ll know that matchmaking isn’t a choice, it’s a sport. The older ladies keep score. The prize? Seeing you paired off and producing grandchildren, whether you like it or not.
In Rockstar Regret, Meinir Williams takes her matchmaking duties seriously. Too seriously. She’s had enough of Cerys Evans hiding in her cheese room. So, she does what any self-respecting Welsh mam would do. She invites her to lunch and “forgets” to mention she’s also invited Nick Davies. Her son and Cerys’s ex-best friend. The boy she'd secretly loved since she was a teenager. The man she now can’t stand.
Meinir would call it fate. Cerys would call it an ambush.
Now, let’s say you’re in her shoes. You live in a small town. You’ve got a well-meaning but relentless matchmaker in your life. Would you escape? Or would you be married off before you knew what hit you?
Take the quiz and find out.
1. You pop into the local shop for milk. The owner gives you a knowing look. "You know who's single? My nephew. Lovely boy.”
A) You fake a phone call and flee.
B) You ask a few polite questions, then disappear before they can set anything up.
C) You panic and pretend to be in a serious relationship with the milk.
D) You smile, nod, and next thing you know, you’re on a date.
2. Your aunt invites you for dinner. The extra place at the table should’ve been your first clue. Then in walks their “lovely new neighbour.”
A) You text a friend: "HELP. EMERGENCY."
B) You make it your mission to be as awkward as possible.
C) You stare at your plate and wonder how long they’ve been plotting this.
D) You sigh and make conversation. Might as well see where it goes.
3. The village Christmas fair. You turn a corner and — bam — there’s your ex. Standing suspiciously close to Meinir Williams. She sees you. She grins. You’re doomed.
A) You fake a dramatic faint and hope for a swift exit.
B) You loudly say, "Oh, fancy seeing you, darling!" and kiss them on the cheek just to watch the matchmaker squirm.
C) You run. Just turn around and run.
D) You give in. Meinir always wins.
4. Your meddling neighbour starts dropping hints. “You and so-and-so would make a lovely couple.”
A) You pretend you’ve taken a vow of celibacy.
B) You start dropping hints right back — about their love life.
C) You develop a sudden and intense interest in moving abroad.
D) You consider it. Maybe she’s got a point.
5. You think you’ve escaped. Then disaster strikes. You’re stuck in a flash flood. With your ex. In a one-bed cottage.
A) You claim the bed and let them sleep on the floor.
B) You make a pillow barrier and enforce strict rules.
C) You accept your fate. Meinir will be smug.
D) You give in and let the tension simmer. Nothing warms a cold night like a little… rekindling.
Results:
Mostly A’s – The Escape Artist
You’ve got instincts. You see matchmaking coming from a mile away. You dodge, deflect, and disappear. But be warned — people like Meinir love a challenge. You’ll slip up eventually.
Mostly B’s – The Chaos Gremlin
You don’t run. You fight. You turn matchmaking into a game, throwing curveballs at the matchmakers just to see what happens. Keep it up, but remember—one day, you might bluff your way into a real relationship.
Mostly C’s – The Reluctant Participant
You never mean to get involved. Yet somehow, you always end up smack in the middle of things. Deny it all you want, but you’re only one snowstorm away from a second-chance romance.
Mostly D’s – The Matchmaker’s Dream
Meinir would love you. You’re easy. One nudge, one not-so-subtle dinner invitation, and you’re walking down the aisle before you realise what’s happened. At least you’ll get a good shepherd’s pie out of it.
So? Did you survive, or did Meinir Williams just ruin — sorry, improve — your love life? Tell me in the comments. And if you’ve ever been caught in a real-life matchmaking scheme, I want all the deets.
Speaking of small-town meddling, forced proximity, and questionable decisions—Cerys and Nick have got all that covered in Rockstar Regret, landing on February 20th.
Read Rockstar Regret now and get ready to witness Meinir’s most ambitious matchmaking attempt yet.
